You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize