PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
I want to see you every morning in the kitchen ass naykid on roller blades making pancakes.
Stop sending me these texts. This is your mom, not your girlfriend.
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
