my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
Literally I woke up the other day and the girl part of me was like “GET CUFFED MOTHERFUCKER” and I went ham on tinder.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
