There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Randomize
