tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Randomize
