In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
