He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
Winning the lottery was the best thing that ever happened to my penis.
Greatest pickup line ever: "We are out celebrating winning the lottery."
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
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