google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
23 Insane Reasons People Got Fired
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
These 31 Gross People Really Put The ‘Trash’ In ‘Trashed’
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates