So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
