Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
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