i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
Randomize
