Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
Randomize