He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
Someone signed my nipple.
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
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