what day is it and did you see me today?
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
But break dance skills will only take you so far
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
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