When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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