oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
Randomize