Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
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