Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
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