We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
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