I wish I could be a nicer person. Or a more sober one.
The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
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