Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
Randomize
