dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
I had to cum in my sink.
Randomize
