Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
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