I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
Randomize
