You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
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