Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
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