i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize
