Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
I informed him that we had less than 5 minutes left to live, and his first words were "I'm trying to think of a good They Might Be Giants quip"
Randomize
