shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
Randomize
