i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
That's how pantless uber rides happen
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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