Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
the bouncer watched the girl drop her ID, saw me pick it up and say OMG SHE LOOKS LIKE ME, and then let me use it to get into the bar
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
Randomize
