and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
not ubering you a puppy
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
