I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
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