So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
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