WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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