OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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