Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
So there we are, fucking beneath the Christmas tree and I glance up and see one of the local Jehovah's witnesses staring in horror through the decorative glass in the front door. I'm so proud of us.
Randomize
