and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
Auto correct isn't even working for how drunk you are
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize
