u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
Randomize
