Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
Randomize