it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
how drunk was i? i pretended i was getting a blowjob from a fuckin dolphin in front of my dad. thats how drunk i was.
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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