the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
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