Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
Apparently on the way out of the ER i asked the nurse to doggie-bag me some more morphine.
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
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