I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
Randomize
