i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
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