addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
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