you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Randomize