Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
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