we have officially lost it.
had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
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