Texts From Last Night

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  (630): View more from Illinois

  Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus

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  (630): Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus http://tfl.nu/u8l4
  Replies (19) Good night (699) Bad night (1870)
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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during

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  (919): I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during http://tfl.nu/dav8
  Replies (21) Good night (3519) Bad night (688)
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  (864): View more from South Carolina

  I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen

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  (864): I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen http://tfl.nu/n18y
  Replies (34) Good night (6989) Bad night (1576)
• Favorite

  (770): View more from Georgia

  That's cool how's he been?

  (404): View more from Georgia

  He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.

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  (770): That's cool how's he been? (404): He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much. http://tfl.nu/1kie
  Replies (6) Good night (4819) Bad night (2067)
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.

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  (610): The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary. http://tfl.nu/0qxf
  Replies (19) Good night (3031) Bad night (6011)
• Favorite

  (941): View more from Florida

  I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special

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  (941): I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special http://tfl.nu/g9sh
  Replies (11) Good night (5936) Bad night (1136)
• Favorite

  (845): View more from New York

  I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount

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  (845): I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount http://tfl.nu/tdiu
  Replies (9) Good night (3486) Bad night (1029)
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  (810): View more from Michigan

  I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.

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  (810): I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here. http://tfl.nu/wy8z
  Replies (10) Good night (3810) Bad night (1066)
• Favorite

  (206): View more from Washington

  before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch

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  (206): before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch http://tfl.nu/cp10
  Replies (14) Good night (2167) Bad night (825)
• Favorite

  (317): View more from Indiana

  I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too

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  (317): I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too http://tfl.nu/ini4
  Replies (11) Good night (687) Bad night (1434)
• Favorite

  (206): View more from Washington

  Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.

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  (206): Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats. http://tfl.nu/azi3
  Replies (12) Good night (524) Bad night (999)
• Favorite

  (936): View more from Texas

  I AM VODKA MAN

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  (936): I AM VODKA MAN http://tfl.nu/r5if
  Replies (5) Good night (816) Bad night (447)
• Favorite

  (214): View more from Texas

  This is my gift to your gina

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  (214): This is my gift to your gina http://tfl.nu/cr2i
  Replies (8) Good night (549) Bad night (397)
• Favorite

  (317): View more from Indiana

  it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.

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  (317): it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor. http://tfl.nu/dyyo
  Replies (2) Good night (922) Bad night (435)
• Favorite

  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  Didn't you used to babysit him?

  (607): View more from New York

  18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.

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  (603): Didn't you used to babysit him? (607): 18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine. http://tfl.nu/bfck
  Replies (8) Good night (1678) Bad night (489)

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