I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
please come you make the beer taste better
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
Randomize
